The Mate He Hates

Amanda’s POVThis content belongs to Nô/velDra/ma.Org .

Liam kept asking Alpha Edward about the battles, and Alpha Edward made sure to answer all his questions until I signaled Sophia to take Liam away because Alpha Edward looked exhausted and might need some rest. I don’t know why I even cared about him.

After everyone had left the sitting room, I was left with Alpha Edward, who looked my way, and we held each other’s gaze with neither of us looking away. We were so mesmerized with each other’s gaze that neither of us wanted to look away, even when he stood to his feet and made his way to me. I still didn’t look away. Reaching where I sat, he squatted before

“I feared not seeing you again,” he whispered, while a lump formed in my throat. “The thought of wanting to see you and Liam kept me fighting all night. I thought of you, imagining coming back to you and seeing the smile of relief when you see me. Amanda, you were the only person in my head as I fought,” he confessed, causing my heart to flutter as a hard gulp passed down my throat. His words were so heartwarming that I felt like pulling him in for a kiss, but I held back and looked away.

A moment of awkward silence hung in the air until Alpha Edward spoke again. “I don’t know what will become of me tonight,” he whispered, and a sudden unease filled my entire being. The thought of something happening to him was making me panic, but I controlled my emotions and put on a rigid expression.

“I might die, Amanda. I don’t know yet,” he said, and fear gripped me, but I still composed myself while still looking away. “Amanda, I want to get your forgiveness. If I fall during this war, I want to die with the satisfaction that I have your forgiveness,” he pleaded, and my heart clenched. “I beg you, Amanda, please forgive me. I want to have your forgiveness,” he pleaded desperately while I swallowed in pain as memories replayed in my head, those painful memories that have forever been imprinted in my mind.

“You don’t have to accept me as your mate. In fact, I don’t deserve you. You deserve someone better, someone who will bring so much happiness into your life. Maybe that man is out there, and I won’t force myself into your life after all I did to you,” he said while my brow furrowed. Why was he sounding this way? Was he giving up already? I thought he wanted me? I thought he was pursuing me? Why was he giving me up so easily?

Taking a deep breath, I steadied the whirlwind of emotions inside me and finally gathered the courage to look back at him, meeting his pleading eyes. “Alpha Edward…” I began, my voice trembling. “This isn’t about forgiveness. It’s about what you’ve done and the consequences of those actions. But…” I hesitated, my heart racing. “But I can’t deny that you’ve changed, that you’re trying to make amends.”

His eyes softened, hope flickering in them. He reached out, gently taking my hands in his. “Amanda, I know I’ve made mistakes, but I’ve realized how much you and Liam mean to me. I’m willing to do anything to make things right.”

I squeezed his hands, feeling the roughness of his skin against mine. “You need to promise me something, Edward. If you truly want my forgiveness, you have to fight not just for me or Liam, but for yourself. You need to come back alive, no matter what.”

The thought of not seeing him again was frightening.

He nodded, “I promise, Amanda. I’ll fight with everything I have. For you, for Liam, for us.”

Tears welled up in my eyes, but I held them back. “Then you have my forgiveness, Alpha Edward,” I said in a whisper and saw a weak smile spread across his face.

He leaned in closer, his breath warm against my cheek. “Thank you, Amanda. I will forever cherish this.” I noticed he stared at my lips, and for a moment, I thought he was going to kiss me, but he didn’t. Instead, he got up and flashed another weak smile at me. There was something about his smile that I found really odd.

“I have to go prepare. We are returning to the battleground soon,” he said while I nodded, and he glanced at me briefly before leaving.

After he left the sitting room, I remained in my seat, pondering his words. I wondered if he didn’t want me anymore. I thought his plan was to chase after me; what changed?

Feeling restless, I stood up and walked to the window, gazing through the space. I found myself questioning everything. Why did I care so much? Why did his words affect me so deeply? Did I really forgive him, and did he truly deserve it?

The thought of losing him now, after all we had been through, filled me with a deep sense of dread. Despite the pain and torture, there was a part of me that couldn’t imagine life without him. The thought of him dying made my heart race with fear.

“Amanda, are you okay?” I heard Matthew’s voice behind me and turned to see him coming my way.

“Not really,” I said, trying to steady my racing heart.

“What is it? Is it about the war?” he asked while I shook my head and looked up at Matthew with fear. “Is there something I need to know?” I asked and saw Matthew’s brow furrow.

“What is it, Amanda? Tell me what is going on?” Matthew was getting more worried. “It’s Alpha Edward. He isn’t sure of coming back alive, and the most shocking thing is that he isn’t interested in our mate bond anymore. He…” I swallowed my fear and pain.

“Calm down, Amanda,” Matthew rubbed my shoulders. I sucked in a deep breath and tried to gather my emotions. “Amanda, Alpha Edward is facing a lot right now. The pressure of the battle, the uncertainty of survival-it’s all weighing heavily on him. It’s not that he doesn’t care about you or the mate bond. Sometimes, in the face of potential loss, people push away the ones they love to protect them from more pain.”

I nodded, trying to make sense of it all. “But he seemed so determined to pursue me before. Why the sudden change?”

Matthew sighed, “Fear can do strange things to a person. It can make them doubt their worth and their decisions. But it doesn’t change what he feels for you. He just needs reassurance, like you do.”

I sighed and looked away. I couldn’t explain why I cared so much about him not wanting to pursue me anymore; at least that was what I wanted.

“Amanda, this war is stronger than we had imagined. Our opponents have alliances, and they are vampires, Amanda, skilled vampires,” Matthew revealed, and my eyes widened. “Is this why he is doubting his return?” I asked, and Matthew nodded. “Yes, Amanda, this is why he has set you free and wants your forgiveness.”

“No!” I shook my head, not wanting to accept it. “He is not going to die. He cannot die,” I blurted out in pain before darting out of the living room.