CHAPTER 68
Xavier’s POV
Ever since I saw her, my chest no longer feels like there is a hundred pounds of weight on it but the sinking feeling of dread is still there.
The sinking dread I felt at the thought of her falling into the hands of Vicenzo’s men which got me so restless.
Even after finding her, it is still very much present and that made me do this.
Kidnap her.
Kidnapping her for the second time was the only option I was left with. I knew persuading her to follow me back home wouldn’t be that easy.
After making sure that she was deeply asleep, we left the hotel and I brought her back home.
Coming out of the second building, I make my way to the main house to check if she is finally awake. She slept soundly all through the night.
She must be awake already. It’s almost noon.
I enter the front door and walk swiftly towards the staircase which I take up before heading to our bedroom.
I just had a conversation with Andre and it’s obvious she isn’t ready to reveal who has been helping her escape. My men don’t have anything on him yet and also on Sebastian.
It’s just as if those two have disappeared into thin air, making me doubt my security power. First, it was Andre. It was hard tracking her down and now it is Sebastian and the jerk who has been helping Andre escape all along.
The door to our bedroom opens before I can touch the doorknob and my eyes interlock with the brown eyes of Jasmine.
Her hand leaves the door and she folds her arms around her bosom while I continue to watch, expecting her to throw a tantrum for bringing her back home while she was deeply asleep.
Instead, she is calm.
Not shouting her lungs off at me or throwing a fit for being kidnapped for the second time.
That was her chance to leave my life and start a new life afresh elsewhere but I couldn’t allow it. Aside from the threat of Sebastian, I just couldn’t allow it.
I can’t let go.
I can’t stop worrying about her.
Those five days of her absence were disturbing. I kept imagining wild things about what could happen to her. Not even when Sebastian is involved.
I just feel she can’t be safe enough without me.
We continue the staring contest until I decide to stop it by venturing inside which makes her step backwards to allow me in.
Slowly, I shut the door, facing her squarely.
Right now, I don’t know the best thing to do. Whether to apologize for kidnapping her or to tell her I had to do this to keep her safe.
Perhaps, I should tell her I was worried and I had to do this.
“What am I doing here, Xavier?” she asks softly, her eyes brimming with unshed tears, finally letting go of her folded arms.
I shift my gaze away from her feeling a tinge of guilt in me. I know I shouldn’t have but I had no choice.
Obviously, I am selfish but I don’t care. She belongs here. No longer in Chicago which is unsafe for her.
“Xavier…”, she calls my name again in a low tone, then pauses.
I look up at her and answer. “I’m sorry I had to come back without letting you know…”
“This is literally a kidnap. I left because I needed to. You don’t need me here anymore. That was our agreement, remember? You find Andre or I find her and you let me go. Have you forgotten?”
At this point, her voice is raised.
I didn’t forget.
“Why do you have to bring me here again? And when I was asleep? Did you do something to me? I can’t even remember leaving my bed or changing my clothes myself.”
I was scared too. She slept so deeply. I had to sit by her side all night, monitoring her breathing and temperature.
I was scared something was happening to her.
“I didn’t do anything other than bring you back home”, I mention, moving closer so I can hold her.
She steps back.
“Home?” She scoffs and laughs shortly. “This isn’t my home. This has never been my home. All of this”, she points around. “they belong to her, not me. The marriage, the punishments, the feelings, everything, it’s hers, not mine. And now that she is back, she should take over her position while I go back to my life.”
Silence falls.
I am short of words on what to say to her. I don’t even know how to defend myself.Copyright by Nôv/elDrama.Org.
She is right.
Andre owns it here. She was supposed to be in her shoes. She was supposed to be my bride but that isn’t even the case now.
The fact is Andre isn’t my bride and will never be.
“I need to go, Xavier. I can’t keep staying here when we obviously had an agreement to let me go once she is back. I can’t continue leaving her life. She can continue from where I stop”, she continues, breathing heavily.
Summoning up the courage, I take two long strides towards her and embrace her.
I’ve never loved a woman.
I’ve never felt this way before.
My heart has never beat this strangely all my life and it means one thing.
Jasmine means the world to me. I want to do all it takes to protect her and make her happy.
I might not be able to express myself in words but I guess actions speak louder than voice indeed.
She does not push me back and resists hugging me until I pull away slowly, placing my forehead on hers and kissing her slowly on the nose and finally on her lips.
“You are Jasmine. I know this isn’t just about our agreement. You are hurt because you know that I knew all along that you were speaking the truth about not being her yet I pretended as if…”
She steps away, cutting me short.
“Pretended?” she laughs and turns around, wiping her face. She whirls around to face me again. “You didn’t just pretend, Xavier. You deceived me. You made a fool of me. Where do I even start from? Is it from how you kidnapped me and kept me hostage or how you forced me into marrying you? What about how you mistreated me? And then your knowledge about Andre yet you kept it all away for me, making me leave her life instead of mine?!”
I keep quiet.
“You know what? There is no point arguing back and forth about this. I just want to go. After all, she owes it all as you said. She is your wife, not me…”
“No!” I interrupt her from going further. “Andre isn’t, you are my wife!”
I may sound possessive right now but I do not care. That is the truth. I can’t even imagine having Andre as my wife. Crossing paths with Jasmine was meant to be and I am grateful Andre fled from our wedding.
“No”, she smiles sadly. “That confession from the other night?” she seems to be asking me a question but I am confused. “That confession is for Andre, not me and that certificate, it is for her. Andre Moore was the name on that certificate, not mine. I am Jasmine Cooper, not Andre.”
“Does it matter? I married you not her”, I try to move closer to her again but she stops me with her hand in between us.
She looks like she is trying so hard to hold back her tears.
She is hurt beyond words and I do not know how to fix this.
“I am leaving, Xavier”, she states firmly, trying to step away but I am quick to block her from going to the door.
Gripping her two shoulders, I jerk her backwards, anger coursing through me for no reason.
“You are not leaving. You have to stay here. Don’t you know your life is at stake? What if you run into Sebastian or something else happens to you? You are safe here. You belong here. If you don’t want me to force you to stay then please cooperate!”
She seemed shocked at my tone and I bit my lower lips in regret.
“I may have deceived you but that is a different thing. I need to be sure that you are safe before anything else so you need to stay here until Sebastian is out of the picture.”
Without waiting for her reply or waiting to see her reaction, I let go of her shoulder carefully before turning back to leave.
I am mad.
Mad at myself.
I don’t deserve her. I should let her go truly. Perhaps, that will make up for mistreating her and I might find her forgiveness.
“Xavier?” Her calm voice calls to me as I touch the doorknob to go out. Before I can look back, her voice reaches me again. “Let Andre go.”
I turn back sharply.
No!
I can’t let that bitch off the hook that easily. She caused all of this. She has to pay for making another person suffer for her mistakes. She needs to pay for troubling and embarrassing me.
“Let her go”, she mutters again, the unshed tears gone from her eyes, making me stare transfixed at her bright brown eyes.
“No!”
“If you want me to stay here, then you have to let her go. It’s either she stays while I leave or she leaves while I stay.”
Is this a condition?
My jaws tighten and I clench my fist, trying so hard to control my anger.
Andre isn’t meant to get off the hook that easily. She didn’t even regret what she did and now I am left with a choice to either keep her or to keep Jasmine.
Jasmine continues to gaze at me in curiosity, probably to read through me and know who I would choose.
For a second, I feel like this is a test.
My anger intensifies and I grab the doorknob, turn it open, storm out and slam the door shut behind me.