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CHAPTER 35.0: As Told by Sadia
CHAPTER 35.0: As Told by Sadia
Sadia’s POV
After my breakup with Lexus, I felt so broken. “Sadia are you going to be okay?” Stella asked me as she came into my room. “I’m worried about you and so is Lydia.”
I was sitting in a beanbag on my phone. “I don’t know…”
Lydia walked in after her with a third girl around their age in the pack. Lydia was 15 and the youngest while Stella was 16 and the third girl looked a little older than them, maybe 17. Still a few years younger than me. “This is Cindy, her boyfriend cheated on her too.” NôvelDrama.Org copyrighted © content.
I guess they thought we could relate. They all sat down in front of me on my carpet and we talked. We talked for hours and it felt good. For the next week we hung out a lot. They were there to listen and be there for me and I actually gave them a lot of advice. They treated me like I was their older sister. “I can’t believe Aqua did all of that to you,” Lydia said.
“I know and the worst part is I kind of miss her and Lexus.” I used to text with Aqua all the time and I couldn’t gain the courage to delete our messages. I really did miss her. “Not enough to forgive them and if I do forgive them, I don’t think I can be friends with them again.”
Cindy nodded. “You don’t owe them friendship.”
There was a knock on the door and when I answered it, it was Calvin. “Cade’s here, do you want me to get rid of him?” When I told Calvin that Lexus cheated on me with Aqua I think he was a little hurt too. He didn’t know Aqua all too well, but he did like her. He was already rejected by her and now he knows the whole time he was pursuing her she was sleeping with my fiancé at the time.
I shook my head. “No, I’ll talk to him.”
The three girls left my room and Cade walked in. “Hey Sadia, I’m probably the last person you want to see.”
I shook my head. “No, Aqua is the last person I want to see. You got it just as badly as I did.”
He rubbed the back of his head. “I guess so, but I wasn’t in love with Vella.”
I had been thinking about Cade a lot in the last week. “I didn’t love Lexus either.” I sighed. “You were right, I liked him, and I was so caught up in the life we would live together. I mistook my excitement of being his future wife and queen for love. I wanted us to be in love because it made it seem more permanent. I was attached to the idea of the lifestyle and my jealousy came from my fear of having to give it up if he loved someone else and not me. I wanted to have both the escape to a better life and love.”
“I still shouldn’t have said it the way I did. It wasn’t my place to tell you that you didn't love him and that he didn’t love you.”
Tears were in my eyes. “Well, it was true but me not really loving him didn’t make what he did to me hurt any less.”
Cade hugged me. “I know, trust me. I didn’t love Vella, but it still felt like betrayal. The night of the ball she begged me to take her back.” He chuckled because of the ridiculousness. “She said she loved me. At the time I felt so bad for not taking her back.”
“At least I know why she was avoiding me…” I took a deep breath. “Let’s forget about them.” He smelled so good. I pulled away a little and stared up into his eyes.
We leaned close and kissed. We didn’t stop there, we started to make out and then moved to my bed with him on top of me. He felt under my clothes and I moaned against his lips. We stripped each other
down to nothing and had sex.
We panted and laid next to each other when we were done. We didn’t say anything for a few minutes before he broke the silence. “You know I was thinking to myself. ‘It’s kind of weird that I had sex with someone my best friend at sex with.’ Then I remembered we both had sex with my ex-girlfriend.” He sighed.
There was a question I was dying to ask him. “When you told Lexus, you had feelings for me was that true or was that just to spite him?”
“It was true… did you have sex with me to spite Lexus and Vella?”
I chuckled. “No, Lexus wouldn’t care, and Vella isn’t worth it. The only person I’d care enough to get back at is Aqua. Other than Lexus she was the closest thing I had to a best friend. I know it sounds pathetic because I’ve only known her for a month but it’s true… I thought we connected but she-“ I stopped myself because I didn’t want to get emotional or even more emotional. “Anyways since Aqua was sort of my best friend, I guess I had sex with someone my best friend had sex with too. I wish I knew how Lexus had always seen me; it was just as friends from when we met to when we were engaged. We weren’t in a real relationship, so I wish I didn’t convince myself we were. I want to blame everything on him and say he wasn’t honest but if I asked him at any point if he were seeing other people, he would have told me the truth. When I asked him if he loved me, he told the truth and when I asked him if he even liked me he told the truth.” Lydia and the other girls told me not to blame myself, but I didn’t explain the situation in full to them. They didn’t know Lexus was only marrying me as a favor and that we didn’t start off romantically involved. Maybe our relationship was set up to fail. You can’t just marry your best friend without them having feelings for you when you have feelings for them.