Chapter 47
Chapter 47
In the car, Xandar drove a bit before starting the conversation, “Lucy, Christian asked me to thank you.”
Lucianne blinked in confusion, “For what?”
Xandar explained sadly, “For not asking Annie why they don’t have kids.”
Lucianne then shrugged and said, “There’s no need to thank me for something like that. The absence of kids is only for two reasons. One is because they don’t want them, in which case, who am I to question their decision? Or two, it’s because…unfortunately, they can’t have them. If that’s the case, then why bring it up to hurt them even more?” 15
Xandar laced his fingers with hers and kissed the back of her hand as he uttered, “You’re amazing.”
Xandar drove a bit more before he said, “I was supposed to let you know about the…delicate subject of kids for Annie before you met her but…Christian and I forgot to brief you beforehand. We only remembered when Russell came up to you when we arrived. By then, we thought it was too late. But when you didn’t ask them about not having their own children at all, even when Annie herself started talking about kids, Christian was more assured that you weren’t going to bring it up throughout our stay. And he really appreciates it. It’s not something that he and Annie… are comfortable talking about. What surprised us though is today was the first time in a long time that we saw Annie talk about kids with zero strain. She spoke about your interaction with Russell like she was just explaining what she saw. There wasn’t any sorrow in Annie like there was in the past whenever the subject of children came up. Neither Christian nor I know how you encouraged Annie to talk about your interaction with children without her breaking down but, sweetheart, keep doing it.”
Lucianne frowned as she whispered, “What happened…to Annie?”
Xandar took a breath before he said, “In the first year of their marriage, when they both visited a cafe one day, someone laced Annie’s coffee with a drug that suppressed pregnancy indefinitely.”
Lucianne was shocked. She thought that even if it were infertility, the cause would be a natural one. Xandar’s explanation had shocked her to the bone.
Xandar gave her a moment before he continued, “We worked around the CCTV footages and caught the culprit but before the interrogation could start, he committed suicide. It was a dead end from there. Christian and Annie visited every doctor and healer we know but they all said there was no cure.”
Lucianne digested the information before she asked cautiously, “Is that why Annie never attends government events with Christian?”
Xandar kissed Lucianne’s hand again before he said, “That’s one of the reasons.” He sighed in despair before continuing, “Lucy, you already know that not everyone in that room has good intentions when they come up to you. Greg and his supporters, especially, tried to make Annie feel uncomfortable when we weren’t around to defend her. Even with them gone, Annie still doesn’t feel safe being there so Christian never tried to persuade her to go to these things with him. If anything, he and I encouraged Annie to steer clear of events with those hypocrites.”
When his mate remained silent, he stroked her hand to get her attention, “Baby, you okay?”
Lucianne was holding back her tears. It felt so unfair. Christian and Annie were good people. How could something like this happen to them? “Yeah, I just…” she sighed, “I just feel helpless that I can’t do anything to help them.”
Xandar smiled and said, “Sweetheart, by not bringing up the subject, you were already helping them.”
She groaned, “No, I mean really help them.”
He kissed her hand again and whispered, “I know.” They stayed silent for the next few minutes before Xandar said, “You have no idea how relieved I felt when I witnessed you stand up to Greg. In front of everyone, no less. The second time you did that on the training ground, I was just in awe. But the first time, I was purely and genuinely relieved. And so was Christian.”
Lucianne shrugged, “The two of you gave me a heads-up. Greg was caught off guard.”
Xandar groaned in frustration, “Stop trying to downplay everything you do, Lucy. Greg never slips, even if he is caught off guard. You made him uncomfortable in a way that I’ve never seen before myself. No one has ever been able to put Greg in his place, not even Christian or m e. But you did it. You rendered him speechless on your very first encounter with him. It’s like you used his own weapon against him.”
Lucianne replied softly, “Because I knew what he used to put people down. He takes the most painful parts of someone’s life and uses it to his advantage. So I just did the same thing to him.”
Xandar got curious, “But how did you know he didn’t feel worthy though? I’ve known him forever but even I couldn’t guess that. He walks around with so much arrogance that no one ever mentions or even suggests that he felt…unworthy.”
Lucianne then explained, “Only those who lack something will see the need to make others feel like they lack the same thing. Greg saw the need to make Annie and I feel unworthy. It’s only because he doesn’t feel worthy himself. He wants to make himself feel better by making us feel worse. He could’ve flaunted his wealth, power or strength to make us feel lack in those aspects but he didn’t. Because those aren’t his insecurities. It’s his worth. He didn’t get the throne despite his efforts to overthrow you; the Moon Goddess never gave him a mate; and truth be told, I don’t think he has someone he can count on. At least, I’ve never seen such a
person with him before.”
Xandar smiled in awe and took a moment to internalize her words and gather his thoughts, before asking, “How do you know all this?”
Lucianne scoffed, “Greg wasn’t the first person to use my past rejections against me. After the first few people, I saw the pattern. Those who taunted me with that had their own insecurities that they were never able to make peace with. Greg is no different… Well, apart from the fact that he’s a Duke, there really is no difference.” Xandar chuckled.
He thought about how incredible Lucianne was as a person, about how much she knew just through her own observations and experience. The sad thing was that she couldn’t see the full extent of what she was. Everyone saw it, except her. And it was frustrating!
Xandar cleared his throat before saying, “Annie is right, you know.” He glanced at Lucianne and continued, “You are the strongest werewolf. I mean, one only has to listen to the way you speak to know that. Most people would be embarrassed to be rejected once, but when you spoke against Greg and even Cummings’s daughter the other day, you talked about your rejections with so much grace. You were so composed. It’s not that you downplayed the severity of it all but you sort of…showed everyone that rejections…do not define you as a person. I cannot imagine the amount of strength you had to muster to do that. It’s like you were sending a message saying that no matter what, you won’t merely survive, you’ll live…to the fullest, even.” 1
Lucianne was touched by how much Xandar noticed in those few minutes she had with Greg and Sasha. She smiled and said, “No matter what, all of us can live life to the fullest. It’s not just me. But we have to choose to do that. Making that choice… is often the most difficult and painful phase to get through. But once you get through it, you’ll be fine. Not instantly, of course. But gradually, you’ll learn to make peace with it. I’m grateful to have something to live for and many friends to live with.” 1
Xandar felt a tinge of guilt that he couldn’t be there for her when she went through the worst phases of her life. She had Juan, Hale, Toby, Raden and a long list of other people whom he met in the past few
days. But he wasn’t there for her. He wished he could have been. Now that he had met her, he vowed to make sure that she would never have to go through anything painful without him. He kissed her hand deeper this time before he uttered sincerely, “You have me, too, Lucy. I hope you know that.”
Lucianne’s smile widened, “I know.” She stroked his hand with her thumb before saying,” Thank you, Xandar. And you have me.”
His animal purred in bliss under her touch. He parked outside the dining hall before pulling her into a deep kiss, then muttered appreciatively, “Thank you, baby.”
They got out of the car and made their way to the dining hall. As they walked hand-in-hand, Lucianne said, “I have a question about the date.”
Xandar smirked, “You’re not going to cancel on me now, are you, sweetheart?”
Lucianne rolled her eyes and asked, “Is it a human date or a wolf-Lycan date? I just realized I didn’t ask.”
Xandar paused on his spot. He didn’t think of that either. He explained as he thought about it, “When I asked you out, I pictured a human date. But now that you mention it…I’d really like to see your wolf again. And I’ll definitely be paying more attention to your tail this time.”
Lucianne nodded once in agreement before she said, “Okay, then. I do want to see your Lycan, too. So which one are we doing first?”
Xandar’s Lycan was jumping in excitement in his head when it heard that Lucianne said she wanted to meet it. Xandar smiled and suggested, “You mentioned that you go for a run a little after 4 a.m. everyday. How about we have the animal date tomorrow morning? We do have the next two days off since it’s already the weekend.”
Lucianne’s eyes widened in surprise. She didn’t expect their date to be only a few hours right after they had planned it. Xandar then teased her with a mock look of suspicion, “My love, have you already planned a rendezvous with someone else? Am I disrupting your plans with one of my competitors?”
Lucianne composed herself and smirked before she said, “Yes, you are, in fact. I was supposed to sneak out to see Russell tomorrow morning but I guess that would have to be changed.” Contentt bel0ngs to N0ve/lDrâ/ma.O(r)g!
Xandar took her hand and continued making slow steps towards the dining hall as he muttered, “I can’t believe I’m competing with a 4-year-old.” 5
Lucianne shook her head slightly with a small smile and said, “Neither can I, Xandar. Neither can I. Imagine the number of little boys you have to worry about if and when you meet the kids from my pack… and also those from our ally packs.” He squeezed the flesh on her waist to elicit a giggle from his beautiful and cheeky mate.
After they had entered the dining hall and bowed together with the attendees, an old couple and their daughter came up to them, making Xandar freeze in shock and discomfort. His grip around Lucianne’s waist tightened, fearful that she would leave his side.
Christian came in shortly after, and he stopped abruptly in his tracks when he saw the three people before his cousin and the Queen. When he snapped out of it, the Duke made quick steps to stand next to Lucianne, sandwiching her between his cousin and himself. ‘How the f* ck did they get in here?’, Christian thought to himself.