Chapter 79
Julian
Guilt grows like a cancer, rushing through my veins, and pumping into my heart. I feel guilty for hurting Elena. She hasn’t smiled, leaned into my touch, or sought out my company in two days. It’s a one-eighty from what she was like a few days ago, and I hate it.
I feel like I’m losing her, and that has me more on edge than the fact that Zeke and a team of my best men are attacking Romero tonight.
“Our marriage is a lie…” I can hear the words in my mind still as if she said them right this instant. My need to make her father pay has cost me the last important thing in my life: her.
I thought having Marie back would help things, lighten the mood for when the shit hit the fan, but it seems Elena has closed in on herself further, and I’m not sure how to reach her. She’s fading every day, pulling away from me, sinking into the sand.
It’s maddening what her silence does to me, and I’m even considering letting her father live to prove to her that things have changed, that I do love her, and that our marriage is real.
At first, revenge was the driving force behind me wanting her, but it hasn’t been for a long time. Since almost losing her, I’ve only wanted her father dead. Not only for revenge but also to protect her. To ensure that neither of us would ever have to look over our shoulders and wonder if something was going to happen. Now, I only have to make Elena believe me.
She’s been hiding in the library, I know she doesn’t want to be anywhere near me, but I’m done pretending like there isn’t an elephant sitting on top of our marriage.
“I want you to stay posted outside every room that she goes in and comes out of, regardless of whether I’m inside it,” I say before heading to the library.
“Yes, sir,” Lucca responds. He’s done well as my second in command, but if I’m honest, I can’t wait for Markus to return. I can’t wait until everything goes back to normal.
I’ve tried my best to give Elena some space, but it’s hard letting her out of my sight while knowing Romero and Lev’s family are working together and after us. Hopefully, that will end tonight, in the meantime, I will be on high alert. Especially today, when I only have a few men guarding the house. Call it paranoia if you want… I call it protecting what is mine.
The Volcove compound is well fortified, and it’s going to take a lot of men to take them down. I wanted to be there, but I decided it is more important to stay with Elena.
When I step into the large library, I find my wife sitting in the windowsill. Her attention is drawn to the book in her lap while mine is drawn to the way her hair shines in the sunlight. She’s beautiful as sin, and I should’ve known the day I forced her name on the dotted line that she would become my demise.
“Did you have a good day?” I ask when she finally looks up from the book in her hand.
“Mhhh.” She nods her head and closes the book.
She won’t even look at me, let alone talk.
“Let’s go to dinner, I want to talk to you about something.”
She gets up from the windowsill and lays her book face down as if she is going to come back to read it later, walking over to me, she stops right in front of me.
Her eyes are lowered, cast down at my chest. I know she is doing this because she’s hurt, but two days of this behavior is all she is going to get. I’ve had enough. My guilt is being drowned out by my ever-rising anger, and her dismissiveness is not helping. I want my wife back, hurt feelings, or not.
“Look at me,” I order, but she shakes her head in defiance like a small child refusing to follow directions.
Grabbing her by the chin, I force her head upward, so she has no other option but to face me. She glares at me like she is about to lash out, maybe scratch me again, but as I wait to give her a chance to do so, she doesn’t make a move.NôvelDrama.Org exclusive content.
“Enough of your pouting. I don’t like how you’ve been acting lately.”
“Really?” She scoffs and crosses her dainty arms over her chest. “Does me not loving you not go along with your revenge plan? Poor you…” She patronizes, and even though I admire her bravery, I will not stand for it. I don’t let my men or anyone talk to me like that. I will not let my wife do so either.
“Your behavior is unacceptable,” I snap, tightening my grip on her chin. “I’ve already told you things have changed. It’s time for you to remember your place… which is by my side as my wife. Now, let’s have dinner on the terrace, so we can talk some more.”
She nods her head as much as she can while still in my grip, and I release her. Taking her hand, I start our descent down the stairs. She doesn’t hold onto me in return, refusing to wrap her fingers around mine. Her slender hand just lies flaccid in my larger one.
I feel like a volcano that is ready to erupt. She is my wife, and yet, she acts as if she is disgusted by my very presence.
We walk in silence, and I use that time to let what I’m planning to say marinate in my head. I know I’m taking a leap of faith here, but if that’s what it takes to keep her by my side and happy, I’m willing to do it… ready to say the words I haven’t since I was a little boy.
Arriving on the terrace, I pull out a chair, and Elena sits down in it almost immediately. An image of Elena in her wedding dress flashes before my eyes as I look over at the spot where our wedding arch stood only a few days ago. I wish I could go back to that day.
“What is it you want to talk about?” Elena asks, her cold demeanor cracking slightly as I hear a touch of defeat in her voice.
“Elena, you are my wife because I want you to be. I didn’t lie to you, not really. When I saw you at the funeral, I knew the instant I laid eyes on you that I had to have you. Yes, I told myself that it was for revenge, and maybe that was part of it, but it wasn’t the sole reason. And now, revenge has nothing to do with me wanting you. I want you because of you. Because you’re the most important thing to me.”
“If that was true, then you wouldn’t still want to kill my father.”
“And I wouldn’t if he wasn’t actively trying to kill me and take you from me. What do you think would happen to you if I was gone? There are others, far worse than I. He sold you to me. I imagine he would sell you to someone else if I were gone. Someone like Lev.”
Just like that, the mask of anger and defiance Elena had carefully placed over her face slips away. Leaving behind nothing but acidic fear and grief.
“I don’t want you to die,” she admits, and the dread I’ve felt since that phone call finally starts to lessen. “I don’t want anyone to die.”
“You are my wife, and I will protect you at any cost. Even if that means doing something you don’t like. I will never stop making sure you are safe, and as long as your father is out there, you are not safe. He doesn’t care about you. What about when we have children? Do you think he is going to stop trying to come after me?”
“I just don’t understand.” She shakes her head, still not ready to admit her father’s fault.
“Elena, I…” The words are on the tip of my tongue. I love you.
Before I can find the courage to speak the words out loud, I hear glass shattering off in the distance. I’m up and out of my seat before I hear the first shots ring through the air. The chair clanks against the ground, and my insides twist at the sound.
Fuck! Where the hell is Lucca? Where are the guards?
I grab my gun from my holster and pull Elena up with my free hand, tugging her behind me. In that instant, my only thought is her. I need to get her somewhere safe. On the patio, we’re out in the open, and in the worst spot when under attack. Fuck!
“Stay close!” I bark over my shoulder and start walking inside.
Elena fists the fabric of my shirt as if she is afraid, her body’s close to mine as we make our way back into the house. I need to get her to my office. It doubles as a safe room, it’s fire, and bulletproof. I just need to get her inside–
We don’t even make it to the bottom of the stairs before the explosion hits, rocking us right off our axis. One second we are heading to the stairs, and the next, we are thrown to the ground from the shockwave of the explosion.
My ears ring, my head throbs, and my lungs burn, but all I can think about is Elena as I frantically try to regain my bearings. Searching around me, I’m desperate to find her, to hold her, but she isn’t there. I can’t reach her.
Where is my wife?
I can’t lose her too.
I have to save her.