Love Fast

It’s hours since the party for the people of Star Falls finished. Even longer since I saw Byron. I don’t know if he left early because he got called away on some urgent business, or maybe he was meeting a date. There are a hundred scenarios vying for space in my head, which means I can’t sleep.

I check the time on the clock by my bed. It’s ten minutes before midnight. There are only eight hours until I’m going to be sitting across from Byron at the diner, but it feels like it’s going to take three months for those eight hours to pass.

I don’t know if I can wait.

I sit up in bed. I can’t wait.

There’s a shuttle down to Star Falls that leaves the Club in ten minutes. If I run, I could catch it. I could be down at the cabins in twenty minutes.

I push the covers off and start pulling on some socks. There isn’t enough time to change completely. I’ll just put my coat over my pajamas. I grab a hat, a scarf, my phone, and keys, and I head out.

I exit the staff accommodations and I can see up ahead the bus pull up to the designated spot. No one’s waiting. I hope it doesn’t leave early because no one’s there. It won’t be expecting passengers. There are no late shifts at the moment outside the party, and we all got off hours ago.

I don’t even know if Byron’s in the cabin, but it’s worth a shot. I can’t wait another minute to tell him how I feel. I run to the bus, but it pulls out before I get to it. I race behind it, trying to catch up. The driver must see me in the mirror, because the bus jerks to a halt and the doors hiss as they open.

“Hey,” I say. “Thanks for stopping.”

“I thought this journey would be a waste of time,” he says. “You going into town?”

“I just want to stop by Beth and Mike’s cabins,” I say.

“Sure thing,” he says. “Although they won’t be Beth and Mike’s cabins for much longer.”

“How come? What’s happened?”

“I heard they sold them to the guy who owns this place. Byron Miller, is it?”

The mention of his name sends sparks of electricity dancing over my skin. “He bought them?” I don’t know what it means, if it means anything. Maybe it was just a good investment. But it feels like it means something. Something important.

The lights in the cabin are on when the bus pulls up.

“Do you want me to wait?” the driver asks.

“I’ll be fine. I can Uber back if there’s no one home.”

“Right you are.” He gives me a quick salute and the doors hiss closed. The bus pulls off, leaving me standing in front of Byron’s cabin. But the lights are on in the cabin where I stayed, not Byron’s. Maybe someone else is renting? I climb up Byron’s porch, ready to knock on the door of the darkened cabin, but I pause. I can’t hear any signs of life at all.

What am I doing here?

If I wake him up, he’s going to wonder what the hell I’m doing. We’re due to meet in a little over seven hours. And I’m in my pajamas. It’s not my best look.

I pull out my phone and double-click the get-me-out-of-here also known as Uber app. Just then, there’s a noise over at my old cabin.

Byron stands in the doorway wearing plaid pajama bottoms and a white t-shirt stretched over his muscled torso.

We lock eyes from across the cabins. “Rosey?”

“I just couldn’t wait until eight,” I say, as if that explains everything. “I have all these things I want to say. And I’m sorry I woke you but⁠—”

“You didn’t wake me,” he interrupts. “And I want to hear all the things you want to say.”

“You weren’t asleep?”

He lifts his hand to scratch the back of his head. The hem of his t-shirt lifts, exposing his stomach. I want to talk about important stuff, but his body? It has the ability to distract me from a nuclear war. “Way too much on my mind,” he says, breaking my focus on his abs. “I’m making ragu. Want some?” A sexy smile curves around his lips.

I definitely want some ragu. Especially if “ragu” is a euphemism for something else entirely.

I scramble down the steps to get to him and he meets me halfway.

“You moved?” I say, glancing back at his old cabin. But I don’t wait for a response before I say, “I went to Oregon and I figured all this stuff out and I want to tell you about it. Because it involves you. You and me. And I realize… so much now.”noveldrama

He gives me a small smile, scoops up my hand. It feels so good to be touching him, to feel his hand in mine. It feels safe and secure. He’s protective without being controlling. I see the difference now. We head into the cabin as if all the time since I’ve moved out has been erased.

“Come inside and tell me everything.”

He heads to the burner and turns off the heat.

His skin against mine feels so right. Warm and safe and solid. I’ve never experienced Byron as controlling or selfish. He’s always let me do what I want to do. I’ve met his friends and seen how they love him—as much or more than this town does. I’ve been expecting him to be like the people around me in Oregon, but I’m not in Oregon anymore. I’m right here in Star Falls, Colorado.

My life changed forever the day I was supposed to marry Frank. Because I met Byron.

“You want some hot chocolate?” he asks.

I just want you, I want to say. I manage to hold back. “Sure.” That should give me room to breathe, time to organize my thoughts. I glance around and see Athena curled up on the floor by the fire. She opens one eye, sees me, but goes back to sleep. Cats.

I take a seat on the couch and he sets about heating milk in the pan and taking mugs from the cupboard. He’s calm and considered, like me turning up in the middle of the night telling him I’ve been to Oregon happens every last Tuesday of the month.

“How come you couldn’t sleep?” I ask.

“Tell me about Oregon first. That’s why you’re here.”

He’s right. I’m stalling. I just don’t know how to start. “I saw Mom and my sisters.”

He turns, catching my eye. “You okay?”

“Yes. I mean, no.” I sigh. “Kinda. It was tough to leave my sisters. But they’re all adults. They have their own journeys to take with my mom. I can’t force them to break free.”

He sighs and turns back to the stove.

“I can only decide what I want. What I do. And…” And what? I decide I want Byron? What if he doesn’t feel the same way? He has his reasons for not wanting anything serious.

He drops marshmallows into the two mugs and brings them both over to the couch. I take the cup from him and our eyes lock. I want to kiss him. I want him to hold me. I want to skip everything before the really good part. But I owe us both more.

“That sounds… logical,” he responds.

“And I want to stop running.”

His eyes widen slightly. “So you’re staying in Star Falls?”

I can’t read him. Is he happy? Disappointed?

“I don’t mean running away from Oregon. I mean running away from… everything. When I left Mom and Frank, I wanted my freedom. I thought geography would solve that problem, but of course, it’s never that simple. I thought if I could keep myself separate, stay on an island, I’d be okay. I’d be free. But the opposite happened. Being on an island is isolating. It’s lonely.”

Sadness shadows his face and he reaches for my hand. I realize that he cares. Really cares. About Star Falls and the Colorado Club. And maybe about me.

I glance up into his eyes. “Freedom doesn’t mean being on an island. It’s making decisions that feel good for me. Decisions that are right for my hopes and dreams for the future. I thought I had to shut down any vulnerability, stay on my island, so I didn’t fall back into the pattern of doing things for other people—so I didn’t end up marrying a man I didn’t love, or having a life I don’t want to please someone who doesn’t care about me. But I figured out that being vulnerable wasn’t the problem. The problem was—is—my mom.” I slide my mug onto the table beside the couch before I spill it. “I came to Star Falls thinking I had a choice: be alone or be controlled. But being with you… it’s shown me a new possibility.”

“Me?” he asks, his expression confused.

“You’re kind, Byron. And caring. And you seem to want me to want things for myself. You sent me that card. Why? It wasn’t going to do anything for you. You took in Athena. You let me move into staff housing. You didn’t insist I delay my move-in date. You didn’t even suggest it. And I know we haven’t known each other very long, and they might seem like little things to you. But to me, they’re everything. You let me be me. You like me for me.”

“I told you, Rosey—I don’t want you to be anyone but you.”

I pull in a breath. Being this close to him is comforting, reassuring. And I miss it. I need to pull the trigger now. I need to ask for what I want. It feels so jarring to be so selfish, and there’s a real possibility that we don’t want the same things. But I’m so clear that Byron is who I want. I’m not sure I’ll ever have this clarity again. So if I don’t start here, asking him for what I want, I never will.

“Like I said, I know we haven’t known each other very long, and I know you have the Colorado Club and it’s stressful and all-consuming. I know you’re not based in Star Falls forever, and I’m just some girl who got on an airplane for the first time less than a month ago, and you probably normally date sophisticated New Yorkers who were born in Paris and vacation in Sorrento—” I groan. Why would Byron pick me? Any woman would be a fool not to want him. He could take his pick.

I tell myself it doesn’t matter—the important thing is I tell him I want him, not that he wants me back. The power is all in the asking.

“What I’m saying is that I know it might not be mutual, but I don’t want to give this up.” I glance at his chest, unable to look him in the eye. “I really like you. Like, really more than like you. I don’t want to only see you for a second or two in the hallways of the Club or once in a while at Grizzly’s. I want to curl up with you at night. I want to hang out at the diner with you on a Sunday. I want you all the time.” My voice has dropped to a mumble. But I got it all out.

I clasp my fingers together, my eyes on my hands, waiting for the letdown. Waiting for him to tell me I’m a nice girl and everything but⁠—

He reaches under my face and lifts my chin.

“I think you’re incredible,” he says. “Everything you’ve been through and you’re here, one hundred percent yourself, making yourself vulnerable.” He shuts his eyes in a long blink, like he’s having to steel himself. “I think you’re the strongest person I know. And the most beautiful. The kindest and… and sexiest. And I’ve really, really missed you.”

I don’t think I’ll ever be able to look away from him. I don’t want this moment to end. I don’t want him to get to the but.

“It’s tricky,” he says. “Me being the owner. You working at the Club. I think we can figure it out.”

My eyes widen. I didn’t hear a but there.

“And you’re right, my plan isn’t to stay in Star Falls year-round,” he says. “We can figure that out too. Nothing stays the same. We’ll have to navigate the changes together.”

No buts. Where are the buts? I need him to jump to the goddamn buts, because otherwise I might just die of hope.

His mouth curls up at the corners and his eyes sparkle at me. “I think I knew the moment you walked into Grizzly’s that you were it for me,” he says. “Worth knew. He saw it in me. But I needed you to pick me for me, to know for sure that you weren’t going along with things.” He pauses and narrows his eyes. “I didn’t realize that until tonight, but you turning up here, telling me you want me—it’s all I needed. We can figure the rest out.”

I sit up straight and take his head in my hands. I’m not sure if I’m dreaming, but if I am, I hope I stay asleep. I press a kiss to his lips, and we crash against each other like lovers who’ve been separated months rather than days.

I just know I never want to be without him again. Not days, not hours, not a goddamn moment.

He pulls away, and for a fleeting second, doubt creeps back in. Until he says, “I know this is soon, but I need you to know…” He holds my face, our gazes locked, lips swollen from our kiss. “I love you, Rosey Williams. I think I did from the moment we met.”

All doubt disappears, melting into my past where it belongs. All I can focus on now is my future. With Byron. “I love you too,” I say.