Chapter 3181 I Want...
I Want...
Leonel's aura began to surge.
The moment he released the reins, he was expelled from Old Bow's statue.
The instant this happened, his power boiled over, and the fluctuations caused the Idol Battlefield to almost flip on its head.
Leonel, though, didn't seem to notice. As the wisps of his hair grew a deeper violet,
and his exposed chest rippled with the rays of light coming from his heart, he stood in silence, gazing off into the distance.
A Valiant Heart.
He felt as though a second piece of the puzzle had come and infused into his body. Leonel had been jaded by this world, but at the core of his being, he was a man who cared... maybe too much.
He had almost died in his first Sub-Dimensional Zone because he felt bad for the teenage girl who thought being sacrificed would be the only thing to bring her family salvation.
During the first parts of his journey, he had diligently counted every single one of the people who fell by his hands, regardless of whether they deserved it or were innocent bystanders swept up into his matters by the orders of their superiors.
He had let the guilt of his talent being greater in comparison to many others weigh him down practically every step of the way, and he had dedicated his life to making the world a better place, not just once, but twice...
At the cost of both his own happiness and that of his wife's.
But it was still deeper than just that.
He had practically built his life for the sake of his father. Whether it was his pursuit of reviving him in his first life, or the building of his Dream Force on his concepts of Respect and Persistence in this one.
It could be said that even the path that dictated his mind itself wasn't his own.
When Leonel really thought back, he couldn't help but wonder...
Was his decision to have a baby with his wife the first time he had made one as his own man?
Did that even count? After all, although he wanted a child, he had ultimately done so for the sake of his wife.
Even that decision couldn't truly be considered to be... for him.
What did he want?
He wanted his friends and family to be happy.
Another cop-out of an answer.Owned by NôvelDrama.Org.
He wanted the world to live in peace and harmony.
Yet another floundering answer.
He really couldn't think of anything so clearly. Who Leonel Morales was ended up being wrapped up in the thoughts and opinions of so many others that unraveling them one by one to get to the very core of his being just felt impossible.
After he shed them all away, there was nothing left but a mindless husk. He might as well have been an Invalid at that point.
But that was when it clicked for Leonel.
Being his own person didn't mean selfishly pursuing everything he wanted to do. Selfishness could also encompass what he thought was good as well... It was all a matter of perspective.
He wouldn't be Leonel without his friends and family, so how could he try to divorce them from himself when they were the existences that made Leonel... well, Leonel. 'What do I want...'
Leonel looked into the skies, his heart shining brighter as his Dharma began to form above his head again.
'I want the Demoness dead...'
His eyes glowed brighter, and the echoing sounds of weapons sharpening resonated through the air.
**SHIIIING! SHIIIING! SHIIIING!**
Leonel continued to stare absentmindedly into the distance, his heart continuing to glow with a fiercer light.
He seemed to have broken through one layer, but he wasn't there yet. There was
more.
'I want Existence to survive...'
**RUMBLE.**
The Idol Battlefield shook to its very core. It was a profound set of words, and yet Leonel still continued to stare off in a daze.
The Demoness was maybe the strongest power in all of Existence.
Existence itself encompassed everything there was or ever had been.
And yet, thoughts about these two just seemed to be the first few layers of Leonel's true inner heart. It was like somewhere deep inside, too deep for any of his Forces to
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seriously at all...
Almost like it was inevitable...
'I want my friends and family to live the lives they have happily...'
**DUDOOM. DUDOOM.**
The echo of Leonel's heartbeat shattered the space around him. Bow and Spear Force formed spontaneously, fusing out of the Forces that lingered in the air and ripping the rules of the Idol Battlefield apart.
No Force other than Bow Force should have been able to appear in this corridor, and yet Leonel did it with ease.
The layers of his heart peeled away one after another.
'I want to be happy...'
**RUMBLE. RUMBLE.**
Clouds began to form above the Idol Battlefield as the world whined and groaned. Existence itself seemed to be witnessing the birth of something that it couldn't quite fathom or understand.
The shaking went as far as to cause cracks to appear at the edges of the battlefield, and some of the long-used Trials almost collapsed in on themselves as a result. It felt like everything was revolving around one young man and his realization of himself.
And yet, there was still another layer to peel away.
As Leonel's heart shimmered like a beacon, he felt that there was something else sitting on the tip of his tongue.
He remembered his days in the Royal Blue Academy, the fun he had between classes, how nice it was sitting behind Aina and watching her cute mannerisms, how fun it was being able to just chat and joke around with his brothers every day, and then return to jeer his father at night.
It was a carefree life, maybe one he yearned for so much he became purposely lazy when that wasn't really the type of person he was.
"... I want to be Free."
Something solidified above Leonel's head.