Beneath the Surface

Lexie

“Just a little while longer?”

I look over at Justin as I kiss Jason good night. It takes all of my willpower not to roll my eyes. He says the exact same thing every night since he learned to talk. “You already know the answer sweetheart so why ask? I already let y’all stay up later than usual to spend more time with Aunt Maddie and Uncle Mason since they go home tomorrow, and now you have to go to bed. We have a lot more unpacking to do tomorrow.” He sighs, but doesn’t argue as he crawls into his bed on the other side of the room from his brother.

The house is a five bedroom, 4 bath, two story home, but they insisted on sharing a room even though we had plenty. I’m pretty sure that as they get older they will want their own space and privacy, but maybe I’m wrong. According to Maddie and Mason they may never want to be apart. Even at 27 years old those two spend as much time together as possible, and bought houses next door to each other. Even having siblings that are twins and my sons that are twins I still don’t fully understand them. I love my brothers and sister and I love to be around them, but there is such a thing as too much! I go over to kiss Justin, and leave the room to go talk to Mason and Maddie before I go to bed as well. I leave the door cracked so that I can hear if one of them has a nightmare.

They have both suffered from nightmares since my attack. Justin has only had a few, but Jason has them pretty often. Justin is definitely handling the attack better than Jason. They didn’t actually witness the whole attack, thank god, but Jason did walk into my room just in time to see my attacker stab me and dive out the bedroom window. Justin only saw the aftermath because Jason had started to scream, and he came to see what was wrong.

They were both clingy to me when I first got out of the hospital, but in the last week or so Justin has started to get back to his normal self. Jason is not. He used to be exactly like his brother, very outgoing, friendly with everyone, loud, and very mischievous. Recently he’s a little more subdued than usual. Most mornings I wake up to find him either in my bed with me or in Justin’s bed with him.

They are both very cautious of strangers now, especially men, but Jason seems to be downright scared of men he doesn’t know. When they came inside to find Carson and Dillon Moving furniture around they both disappeared to their rooms until after the men left. I’m thinking about sending them to a therapist, but Shawn told me to give it a couple more weeks and if there’s still a problem then send them, but to give them a little time to see if they worked it out themselves.

I peek into my room on my way by and see that my bed has also been put together and sheets on it. I can’t get over how much we got done today. Carson, Mason, and Dillon put all the beds together and rearranged my furniture where I wanted it. Maddie put sheets on everyone’s beds and unpacked some of our clothes while I unpacked the some boxes. No one would let me move any boxes, but they agreed it should be okay for me to unpack them and put some stuff away.

I think about our new home as I walk down the upstairs hallway. I absolutely love it. It’s fairly new, the realtor told Shawn it had only had one previous owner. Upstairs there’s a hallway straight down the middle of the house. There are two bedrooms on each side, and a bathroom to the left between the two rooms. The boys are in the first room to the left, and I’m in the first to the right.

I stop walking as I come to the bottom of the steps and hear Maddie and Mason talking about me. I sit down on the bottom step and listen.

“Mason, I’m worried about going back home and leaving them here all alone. What if they need something? What if she needs help? She doesn’t know anyone here. Who would she go to?”

“I know sweetheart, but Shawn says this is the safest option for her. We have to trust him. He knows this kind of stuff, we don’t. We know medicine, and he knows criminals. We have to listen to him on this. She is safer away from us, in a new town, with a new name.”

“I understand that he knows criminals but like you said we know medicine. She still has 3 broken ribs and a cast on her arm for Christ’s sake! She had surgery on her arm 4 weeks ago and was stabbed 5 weeks ago! How is she supposed to take care of two boys herself? Not just any two boys but Justin and Jason! You know how much trouble those boys usually cause! Do you not remember that time you were babysitting and the tie you to a chair? One of us should stay here with her!”

“I understand what you’re saying Maddie, I do, but Shawn also said it could put her in danger for us to stay. We can visit every now and then for a day or two at a time, but we can’t stay.”Content (C) Nôv/elDra/ma.Org.

I walk into the kitchen where they are sitting, “Y’all can stop trying to make decisions for me. I am perfectly capable of taking care of my kids. Yes I still have some pain but it’s not nearly as bad. Yall are going home tomorrow, and going back to yall’s jobs. You’re not putting your lives on hold for any longer because of me.” I grin at mason,” besides who would break all the hearts back home without you there?”

Mason chuckles and shakes his head at me, but he knows it’s true. He’s a huge player. With his blond hair, blue eyes, tanned skin, boy next door good looks, and southern charm he’s got women throwing themselves at him left and right. Doesn’t hurt matters that he’s a doctor and his last name is Brown. Everyone in our home town knows our family has a ton of money. Mason has gold diggers crawling out of the word work after him.

“Alright, I’m going to bed. I’ll see y’all in the morning before you leave.” I kiss both of them on the head as I walk by and head back upstairs to my room. I check my closet and under my bed, and make sure my steak knife is under my mattress before I finally lay down and let myself drift to sleep.