Always Been You

~Dante’s POV~NôvelDrama.Org owns this text.

I was on my way to meet my lawyer with regard to the divorce when I received a call from Lev reminding me of the Japanese project. I cursed because I had completely forgotten about it. Fuck, what was my PA doing? The last few times I’ve seen her, she’s been a total mess and very unprofessional. It seems like all she thinks about is my cock. I have seen the way she looks at me. I will fucking have to fire her, very incompetent.

I turned my car around while I called my lawyer to cancel, as I had to prepare those documents. Lola managed those documents back then, and she is very knowledgeable about the Japanese market. This was five years ago. That deal was secured by her single-handed efforts, and now that it has expired, we need to find a way to reinstate it, but I have no fucking idea what to do. When I got home, I found her sitting down to dinner with the children. They looked happy seeing their mother; I was supposed to be at that table with them, but I couldn’t because I needed to work. I greeted them and offered each of them a perk before apologizing for the fact that I wouldn’t be able to join them for dinner. Thanks to traffic, I arrived home late. As soon as I entered my home office, I threw everything out of the way and sat down at my desk. There is no way in hell that I will be able to complete this task by myself. I would have to ask for Lola’s help. I successfully worked off a portion of the deal, but there was still a section for which I required Lola’s input. Lola was that good. After checking the time, I headed downstairs to prepare some coffee for myself, but when I returned, she was still seated at the table with her phone in her hand.

“Um, Lola. I would need your help. We had a contract with the Japanese that lasted for 5 years, but since it has now expired, we need to provide them with a new proposal so that we can continue to work with them for a few more years under the original terms of the contract.” I cut to the chase, and she kept pressing her phone while answering me.

“When do you need me?”

“As in, like yesterday,” I said as I brewed my coffee. She nodded, and I went back into my study.

I was feeling a little anxious as I sat at my desk, and I found myself fidgeting more than usual while maintaining my focus on the entrance to the space. This was not a good idea, was it? But then I don’t have much of a choice, do I? My incompetent personal assistant didn’t help either. The project is due in three days, and nothing is in place. I needed to work with four eyes on her. My ex-wife, I mean, wife, at least for now, and today was so hellish.

Normally, I could have done this on my own if I had the time, but my personal assistant threw me off the bus. My stomach is in knots whenever I think about spending the night putting on work alongside Lola. Since her return eight months ago, Lola has been tormenting me, unknowingly. She had been filling my head with images of her alluring curves, and I couldn’t get them out of my head. Since she came back, I made her believe I have been seeing someone. But in reality, I couldn’t. My eyes have been on her and her alone. No one else comes close to her or how she makes me feel. Since she has given birth to our children, she has somehow managed to become even more stunning and curvier. I have no idea why this has happened. I have always been quick to pick fights with her so that my mind wouldn’t wander toward the direction of how my name would sound coming from her mouth while I was banging her. I keep having dirty thoughts about her. I had so many fantasies about taking her against every surface that was possible that I began to feel as though I was going crazy. Call me a creep, but that was the only way, and I think I’ve gone too far because I have been served with divorce papers.

My feelings towards her are not supposed to be like this at all. She betrayed me and kept me away from my kids for four good years. What in the world is she to me? Why, after all these years, am I still unable to let go of the desire to be with her? She has been messing with my thoughts since we were kids. Even after her betrayal, I haven’t been able to find a solution.

I have been trying to dissuade her from coming closer to me because I want her so badly. I made several attempts to get rid of her, but I was unsuccessful. Her presence draws me to her like a magnet. No one can be like her. I thought that if I caused her pain, it would make me feel better about the betrayal that she had committed against me, so I tried to cause her pain. However, seeing her in pain caused me to feel pain as well. I did everything in my power to make her life a living hell, but all that I succeeded in doing was making my own life a living hell because, in the course of hurting her, I ended up hurting myself as well. It’s impossible for me to forget her; she’s just too memorable. My heart beats only for Lola and no one else. Growing up, she never got hurt watching me with different women, even after holding on to the promise I made to her. At this point, she probably doesn’t even notice when I cheat anymore, because she’s grown accustomed to it. My wife is unmoved. She exudes an air of self-assurance that gives me the willies and makes me want to run and hide. Her self-confidence scares the shit out of me. My wife drew me in. Had I craved to touch her, taste her, kiss her….

I shook my head violently in order to get rid of those indecent thoughts. She will soon be my ex-wife. I can’t have such thoughts about her. But there’s this question that keeps popping into my head: am I, Dante Monroe, willing to let her go for good this time?

I let out a sigh and rested the back of my head against the back of my chair while massaging the bridge of my nose. This should not be happening at all. It’s not normal. How is it that one person can have such a tenacious grip on my mind without even trying? Even though I make every effort to avoid her, she has been and always will be the one; however, I have no choice but to let her go. Without a doubt, there is something about her that continues to entice me.

Perhaps it was my broken promise or the trust. I mean she betrayed me.

I was startled when I heard a soft knock on the door, and I immediately straightened up in my seat. I had to clear my throat before I could strongly encourage her to come inside.

Does she want to kill me? I thought to myself as Lola walked into my study wearing a very short dress while I was trying so hard not to give in to temptation. Is she trying to get under my skin? Is she attempting to extort a large sum of money from me?

My mind was a mess, more of a mess than it was before. I drew my gaze away from her.

“Um… I’m here, so let me know how I can help.” I stared at her; she was nervous. Her fingers were playing nervously with her thick, long black hair that was left cascading down one shoulder and falling into her cleavage. Her cleavage…

My God! This woman has grown so much that right now she is such a temptation. ‘My Lola’. I dangerously pushed forward to follow the course with my eyes. I fucking gave myself a sole moment to gawk at her, or what is mine, nearly gulping out loud. Damn, this is going to be a very long night. The dress exposed so much skin, so much to drool over…

Wait, a minute… Is she trying to seduce me?