A REASON FOR MARRIAGE

A severe pain lanced Sara. She shouldn’t be feeling pain, yet she also couldn’t quite believe he was being so harsh. So this is what it would feel like when the time came. Well, the time had come. She tried to pull her hands from his. He wouldn’t let her go. A spark of anger restored her equilibrium.

“Simon-”

“Let me explain. I don’t think you know what I mean.”

Oh God, he was going to explain, and she’d just blubbered all over him. She spoke quickly, “No, really, I do; it’s fine,”

“Sara, shut up!”

Simon’s exasperation was palpable. She shut up.

“I’ve avoided being alone with you, because if we’re in any kind of close proximity for more than two minutes, I want to take you to bed with an urgency that is not necessarily good for someone in your condition.”

Her condition. For a second Sara didn’t even know what he meant. Her heart was thumping, and a treacherous surge of joy in her chest was threatening to strangle her. He did still desire her. But then at the intent, serious look on his face her mind and vision cleared. He was worried that he’d hurt her?

That all-too-familiar melting sensation was spreading through her chest, warming her like the brandy.

“Oh.”

“Yes. Oh.”

Sara tried valiantly not to let the desperation she felt sound in her voice. She knew it was there, though, when she stumbled over the words. “Well…I don’t think-That is, as far as I know, it’s OK. I mean, lots of people don’t even know they’re pregnant at this stage.”

Her face was getting warm. Could he see how badly she wanted him? She prayed not.

“How are you feeling now?”

Like I want you to rip my clothes off and make love to me right here: the words resounded in Sara’s head. She gulped and could feel a trickle of sweat roll down between her breasts. “Fine. Absolutely fine. I haven’t been sick once this week. So, unless it comes back…”

Simon stood up and paced.

Immediately Sara wanted him back by her side.

“You see, that’s what I mean, you need to go and speak to the doctor so we know what to expect.”

He looked down at her with a stern expression, all hunger and desire erased from his gaze and eyes. Sara felt as if she was a dog in heat, and struggled to control her libido. Was this a side-effect of the pregnancy-like the way her breasts felt so heavy and tender? If so, how was she going to cope with the next eight months?

“So, we’re agreed, we’ll go to see the doctor tomorrow?”

Sara just nodded, only half-taking in what he was saying. Her whole being was focused on the fact that he still desired her and had been holding back.Nôvel(D)ra/ma.Org exclusive © material.

He came back and sat down beside her. Sara tried not to let the hunger she felt show on her face.

“Look, Sara, you need me now. Let me take care of you…and the baby. Forget about everything else. Let’s just concentrate on the baby and preparing for that…”

He made it sound so easy. And, while Sara felt it was important to assert her independence, she knew he was right. For now. It wasn’t just about the two of them any more. She’d worry about the shifting parameters of their affair later. The knowledge that he still desired her was intoxicating, she went to bed that night and slept properly for the first time all week.

__________

“The doctor said it’s OK.”

Sara immediately winced and froze inwardly at how baldly she’d let the words come out. She’d had no intention of even saying anything, but standing here, back in the apartment, holding all the bumph from the doctor’s office and the baby books Simon had insisted on buying, something primal was rising up within her-a need that had to be acknowledged.

Simon turned to face her. He was dressed in faded denims and a dark coat, cheeks slightly reddened from the brisk breeze outside. Sara’s heart clenched. She’d never grow tired of looking at him.

He walked towards her, a glint in his eye. “What’s OK?” he asked.

Sara flushed but looked at him steadily, not backing down. “If we…you know…wanted to-”

“Make love?” he asked innocently, that glint looking decidedly suspicious.

“Yes,” Sara bit out through a clenched jaw, and wished that she didn’t feel the way she did-that she wasn’t enslaved by this man and his body and how he could make her feel. The doctor had pointed out that it was entirely natural to be feeling more desirous at the moment, the result of hormones. But Sara knew well that the pregnancy was only heightening what was already there in raw form.

Simon came very close and took Sara’s jaw in his hand, its delicacy testing all of his powers of restraint. His thumb smoothed the satin soft skin of her cheek. He saw her pupils dilate and it had a direct effect on his body.

“We’ll go for dinner later.” He had to put some kind of control on this wanton craving he had. She was pregnant, for God’s sake.

Her jaw moved against his hand and he hardened, his erection straining painfully against the constricting material of his jeans.

“OK. Where?”

“You choose. I have to go to the office to pick up some papers; I’ll be back in an hour.”

_______

“You’ve booked us a table where?”

Sara looked at the guide book again, slightly mystified by Simon’s incredulous reaction. “A restaurant called Amorous Ambiance,”

His face looked slightly pained. “Are you doing this on purpose?”

Sara was nonplussed. “On purpose-why? It just sounds nice. It’s one of the oldest restaurants in New York,” She held out her phone for him to see.

Simon took the phone and pressed the power button. “I know the restaurant-or, should I say, I know what it’s famous for.”

Then he took her hand to lead her out of the apartment and into the lift. Sara followed.

“What do you mean “famous for”? Is there something I’m missing?”

“Hmmmm…. Something like that,” he muttered. “You’ll see.”

It was now late evening. Simon had been held up at the office, and the sky in New York was darkening to an inky blue, stars popping out. She’d changed into a simple black dress. Simon had showered and changed into dark trousers and a dark sweater under his black overcoat.